The guide to preparing for Ofsted

So we’ve got a new handbook, but it’s a lot to wade through, so how’s this for a shortlist?

Things to do to prepare for Ofsted:

  • Steal a British Values policy from someone else’s website. Change the school name.
  • Get a British Values display up somewhere. Flags compulsory. A picture of the Houses of Parliament a bonus.
  • Teach the kids the British values. (Not necessarily in any depth, after all they’re meaningless… but make sure they can crowbar “the rule of law” into pretty much any answer they give to an inspector)
  • Teach the governors the British Values (see above)
  • Teach the governors everything in Raise. Everything.
  • Create some assessment without levels data. (You can achieve this by taking your old levelled data and changing the levels into some new code; they don’t need to understand it)
  • Teach the governors the new code
  • Make sure you prevent at least a couple of people moving up the payscale. This shows rigour.
  • Buy in enough tippex to anonymise the appraisal data for the last three years, but not so much that you can’t see that you prevented someone moving up the payscale.
  • Scour every book – ensure that every other page has a detailed comment, with pupil response (left-handed writing may help here)
  • Look closely at the marking quality in your school; re-write your policy so that it matches what inspectors will see. They can’t get you on that one, then.
  • Upload your curriculum, pupil premium policy, SEN policy, behaviour policy, sports funding report, governor checklist, QTS qualification, birth certificate and last will & testament to the school website.
  • Stick labels on pupil premium pupils’ books, trays, chairs, tables and ear lobes.
  • Print off your attendance data. All of it. At least thrice weekly, just in case.
  • Gather a shortlist of supportive parents. You may want to call them on the morning to ensure that they are available to loiter on the playground and say the right things

Oh… and if you can teach the kids well, all the better!

8 thoughts on “The guide to preparing for Ofsted

  1. dodiscimus 20 June 2015 at 1:04 pm Reply

    As part of a recent Ofsted inspection of an ITT provider I have heard on the grapevine that trainee teachers were all asked about their understanding of British values.

  2. cazzypot2013 20 June 2015 at 1:10 pm Reply

    Reblogged this on The Echo Chamber.

  3. thinshadow 20 June 2015 at 3:49 pm Reply

    I will bulk buy union jack sunglasses and hand them out during the celebration assembly. British Values, British Fashion.

  4. philsalisbury 21 June 2015 at 10:13 am Reply

    You forgot having lively debates amongst staff (now one of the criteria for outstanding leadership). We started with ‘Is a jaffa cake a biscuit.’.

  5. HT Bruce 21 June 2015 at 11:44 am Reply

    Made me smile, and I can see where this is coming from but, as one of the 1600 who survived the chop, I really can honestly say that it’s not accurate.
    The mantra is all about learning and progress and collecting evidence that children are learning well, behaving well and making at least good progress. While the rest of it is of some importance – especially the British values – the overriding judgement rests on progress.
    Sure it’s good to see well marked books, but not as good as seeing books with much less marking in them yet clear evidence that the feedback (not just marking) is having a real impact on pupils’ learning.
    I think that the three key things are these:
    1) Make sure that you have a crystal clear understanding of your school’s strengths and weaknesses. If you have this, then inspectors are much more likely to believe that you will address any lesser issues that they find e.g. a missing curriculum document from the website.
    2) Make sure that the books and data show great progress over time. Sadly, some left handed marking won’t do this. It’s one of those things that, like planting an apple tree, is best to have been done some time in the past. Focus forensically on the main groups in your school – especially deprived pupils
    3) Make sure that the children will behave everywhere and with everyone, including ‘not the best’ supply teachers.
    And underlying all this is school leaders making sure that what happens in the classroom is challenging, engaging and enjoyable for pupils.
    Not really rocket science.

  6. STMDep 22 June 2015 at 2:33 pm Reply

    ‘making at least good progress’ – I think we’d all love some clarity over what that’s supposed to look like these days

  7. Leah K Stewart 22 June 2015 at 6:28 pm Reply

    This is funny, I like this! Don’t forget to turn the heating on, so the inspectors are warm and happy… maybe also have some complimentary jaffa cakes at the ready.

  8. Claire Mary Dawes-Redmond 27 June 2015 at 1:42 pm Reply

    lol this made me laugh- Steal a British Values policy from someone else’s website. Change the school name.

    Mostly as we did this.

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